Sleeping

I have this sleeping problem.....I just can't sleep. Well.....I sleep but not very well and not without help---Ambien CR---Sleepytime Tea---Melatonin. Some nights I wake at 11:30 pm and NEVER fall back to sleep----other nights I wake and fall back to sleep 20 times. Some nights I lay awake waiting for sleep to come for 3 plus hours.

I have read every book printed on sleep. Done every thing anyone has suggested from warm milk, glasses of wine, no naps,no food, nothing stimulating like scary movies before bed....everything!!! Not much has helped.....it is the way it goes.

But what I am crazy about is my husband. The minute my husband lays his head on the pillow---I can count on both hands about how long it is before he is snoring contentedly....how does this happen??? I just don't get it! He assures me that he does not sleep as soundly as he did years ago when we were both younger~~~but as far as I can tell in less time than it takes to count to 10, he is sleeping soundly and snoring!!!! It just does not seem fair!

I just want a little fairness in my old age.....and a little sleep.....YAWN!

Happy Birthday Dad

Today would have been my dad's birthday. He died when I was 29 from lung cancer. A smoker most of his life, it caught up to him while he was in his 60's. So sad.

My dad was so handsome~~~tall, dark hair~~~blue eyes.....a real good looking man. He worked at heavy construction building roads and bridges. He drove those huge machines that moved dirt and trees and rocks. He came home every night exhausted and dirty and hungry. He never went out at night and rarely went anyplace with out one of us along.

He was surrounded by females in the house---even the dog was a girl! But he was patient with us and kind and if he got enough of all of us he would retreat to his garage/workshop to listen to talk radio and fix things.

He never had any sons, so as I grew, since I was a tom boy, my dad got me things like race car tracks and basketballs. I will never forget the Saturday that he put the basketball hoop up on the garage door and taught me to shoot! He had a big smile on his face and I was in heaven.

He drove many miles during my high school years hauling me back and forth to play practice and speech team and competitions. He never grumbled or complained, even though now I know he must have been so tired by his heavy work all day and just wanted to sit in the TV room and watch Huntley and Brinkley.

He did not graduate high school, having to drop out after his own dad died, but my dad was one of the smartest men I knew. He read constantly---even taking books along with him to read during lunch break. He was up every morning by 4am with a pot of coffee and the newspaper, catching up on all the news from around the world. He could speak about any subject and was a master at many---like UFO's! I got my love a reading from my dad.....what a wonderful gift to give to your child.

I miss my dad today----I miss my dad every day. He was a wonderful , quiet guy who made a deep impression on this daughter of his. Love you dad.

Running with Scissors

Naming this blog was the first important thing to do. Boring titles like "Musings from Lynn" or "Books, Tea and Me" were already being used . I wanted something catchy, but also something that said a little about me.

Those of you old enough to remember going to public school back in the 60's may remember the report cards they gave out in kindergarten. The standard "A, B, C , D and F grades were not introduced until grade school. The kindergarten class, however, was measured by "S" for Satisfactory "N" for Needs Improvement and "U" for Unsatisfactory.

Such skills as "Sharing", "Takes Her Turn" and "Nap Time" were all measured by this grading scale. They had a self control and safety column that had as one of its headings "Runs With Scissors". I got a "N" in this column more than once.

It wasn't like I was trying to be dangerous----I was just excited to be allowed to use a pair of scissors! At our home, my mom had a pair of silver sewing scissors with a dot of red fingernail polish applied to the handle. That dot was to remind you to NEVER, EVER use these scissors---EVER.

They were her revered sewing scissors only meant for cloth----no paper was to ever touch their lips. And boy would my mom know it if you did use them to cut out valentines from construction paper or to cut off the box top of a cereal box to send away for the cool prize Tony the Tiger was offering.

But temptation over took me a time or two~~~and did I catch it. Scissors were off limits in my house. PERIOD! So the morning the kindergarten teacher, Mrs. Boyle, said were were going to be cutting PAPER in class I could not control myself! We all took a turn walking up to her big oak desk and checking out our own pair of scissors! On my desk was a stack of colorful construction paper---and in my hand was the forbidden item---SCISSORS!

Of course I RAN back to my desk----she might change her mind and tell me that these scissors were not for cutting out hearts and flowers and shapes---and that I had to give them back! But she didn't. She kindly warned me NOT to run with scissors in my hand because I could fall and get hurt---seriously hurt!

And then when the report cards came later on that fall, there was the big "N" next to "Runs With Scissors"!

I still run with scissors. Not literally anymore----but throughout life. How fun would it have been to be cautious all the time and safe? If caution was my guide, I would have never gotten up on stage and played opposite a huge white rabbit named Harvey that no one could see. If playing it safe was my goal, then I bet I would not have been throw off the school bus for being too loud with my friends!

Riding on the back of a motorcycle with~~ a boy~~when I was 14 without my parents knowledge would not have been an options for the play- it- safe girl. Getting married at 18 to my high school sweetheart and staying with it for 34 years has been alot of work----but not safe.

24 children coming in and out of our lives these past 30 years is not a safe course to take. Fun. exciting, heartbreaking, dangerous---YES! SAFE---NO!

So I titled my blog "Runs with Scissors" to remind me of the not so safe path I have taken at times in my life---and to nudge me to "run" a little more while I still have time.

Creating a blog!

Creating a blog.....can someone who has little to no computer knowledge save opening ones email and checking facebook, really be able to create a blog?! WHY NOT! I have read many blogs by others who were of my generation and older.....I should be able to do this. Now the question is...do I really have anything to say that anyone would want to read? Ahh---now that is the question.

I love to read---maybe I could talk about all of the books I have read or are reading......

I love gardening---esp. herb gardening---maybe I could write a blog on that.

I have 23 children----would anyone want to read anything about what it has been like raising 23 children? Hmmm---could get boring....maybe even depressing in spots. But then again it could make a few out there laugh and be glad it was not them....or make them want to have kids...

I have homeschooled for over 20 years----would that be something that I could talk about? Could I give a few tips on what I found that worked and what just was a big waste of time and money?

So many options----guess I will just have to wait and see what I feel like talking about each day.